We got the house.
The house I liked most, the one with a chook pen and vegie garden and frog pond. The one near the river. The one with wandering ducks and no through roads. I haven’t even seen the place – The Dude has been valiantly doing all the legwork – but I am already in love with it.
We move in one week from now. Cue the joyous chaos.
I am proud.
In the last few months I have made enough money to keep myself alive AND save up enough to pay four weeks bond and two weeks rent, AND to pay the fuel for The Dude to drive 800km to come get me and all my stuff AND for us to drive back, AND to hire a truck to move all our possessions from storage into this shiny new house, AND to turn on the lights and internet. Thousands of dollars in six weeks, hallelujah!
But there were some unexpected hitches: from the technical (upgrading my wireless internet connection) to the personal (travelling north to my uncle’s funeral). Due to those expenses, and a few more, The Dude and I no longer have enough cash to move house elegantly: to stop on the drive back and eat a leisurely pub lunch, to fill up our empty pantry with bulk staples, to replace the microwave and desk that were too craptacular to put into storage.
And most importantly, to have a bit of security blanket left over in case something happens. Because it always does, right?
- I need to make a few hundred dollars in the next week.
- I need to do this by solving a problem for you.
- And I know about one issue that’s come up a half-dozen times in recent client sessions.
See if it resonates for you.
You have an offering you love, and a sales page that doesn’t do it justice.
You have a sales page that doesn’t work.
It just… misses.
When you tell the right people about the work one-on-one, or show them a sample, they get wildly excited. “Wow, that’s amazing! Why haven’t you told me about it before?” And you admit, Well, actually, I think you read this sales page a month ago, but you’ve forgotten all about it.
The sales page doesn’t… quite… feel good. Feel like you wrote it. It doesn’t have any edge, any oomph, any GUTS. It’s pastel watercolours when you wanted neon tattoo.
You suspect that you aren’t promoting this offering as much as you should, because you can’t proudly point to the sales page and say, “Hey! Here it is! Check out all my majesty!”
You make few sales, or no sales at all. Financially this is woeful, but more than that is the missed opportunity. The work is wonderful, you know it’s wonderful, but you obviously aren’t communicating its wonderfulness. So many people could benefit from your offering, but it’s not reaching them. It’s so freaking frustrating!
You wish you had a sales page that is as amazing as the offering it promotes.
Good news, chickadee!
You already have everything you need to write a gobsmackingly uplifting and effective sales page.
- an amazingtacular offering
- big-time enthusiasm for the work you do
- your own dee-lighful voice and style
- the capacity to Make Shit Happen
The bones are all there, darlingheart.
Together, we’ll strip back your sales page, find those beautiful bones, and polish the everliving fuck out of them.
Enter… the Sales Page Clinic!
One glorious live experience, featuring amazing participants with less-than-amazingpants sales pages.
You can attend and write a gazillion underlined notes as you watch.
You can watch (or rewatch) the recording later, in your own time.
And, if you are brave, you can volunteer your sales page to be dissected, stripped back, and TRANSFORMED.
Together, live on the webinar, we will suss out what is ailing your sales page, and what needs to happen to make it sing.
Potential issues we might fix:
- The Airy-Fairies
- The Process Infatuation
- The Invisible Audience
- The Offroader
- The Price Is Not Actually Right
- The What’s All This, Then?
- The Suit Possession
- The Chiaroscuro
- The Garage Sale Schemozzle
- The Putt-Putt
- The Bang and Whisper
- The Banquet Imbalance
What are all of these fascinating issues? You’ll have to join us to find out!
How to join us
The Sales Page Clinic will be held as a live webinar, with the recording available to all participants afterward.
The date will be on Saturday the 13th of October at 8am Brisbane time. (That’s 5PM on Friday the 12th of October in US Central time, and 11PM on the 12th in London time.)
The cost is $50.
Ready to rock your sales page? Click the link and get started!
How many sales pages we get through and how long we’ll go for will be determined by how many people sign up. The maximum will be eight sales pages in two hours, ’cause my brain will fall out after that.
If we have more than ten participants I will a) cheer and b) try to choose participants who are representative, so that even if you aren’t featured you will learn squoodles. If that happens, priority will definitely be given to the first people to sign up.
(So you should click that link right now, is what I’m saying.)
If we have more than twenty participants I will a) cheer more and b) run an extra session along the same principles. That’s enough time for me to lay out pretty much everything I know on what makes sales pages joyous, ick-free, and effective.
And wish me luck for the house-moving. I’ll send photos of the ducks.